Tag Archives: Nestle

Valentine’s Week: One Shape Fits All

IMG_3597[Ed. note: All week, I’ll be eating seasonal Valentine’s Day candy. Because Valentine’s candy is very much a Thing, but doesn’t always satisfy the traditional definition of a candy bar, this week I’m operating under this temporary definition: If it’s a sweet that can be attached to a valentine — either the kind you’d pass out and collect in decorated shoeboxes in 4th grade or the kind of a more mature and romantic nature — it’s a candy bar.]

Valentine’s Day candy is fun because you always know what to expect.

And that is candy in the shape of a heart.

(Sometimes the candy isn’t shaped like a heart, but instead shaped the same way as it always is, only placed in a heart-shaped package. Which is technically the same thing, but is definitely not the same thing.) Continue reading

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Two Quick Pieces


Tasting Notes

– You know, I DID feel like a skinny cow.


Tasting Notes

– If you’ve ever wanted to eat a suit-jacket button made of chocolate, this candy bar is for you.

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WTF Is This?: Carlos V

IMG_3559Still sullen from the Packers’ remarkable defeat, I walked into the Walgreens around the corner from me and went a-lookin’ for new candy. I saw this dude smiling at me, and grabbed it because I’d never seen it before and Carlos looked like a gallant fella. It was $0.39. I’ll get to how it tasted (spoiler alert: mediocre) in a moment, but here are some things I’ve noted since that purchase:

– Carlos V is named after Charles V, the Holy Roman Emperor who allegedly introduced chocolate to the European courts. I had always thought it was just Johnny Depp, though I never actually watched the movie, instead choosing to pester Sister Bar by pronouncing “Chocolat” like an imbecile.
– Carlos is Spanish for Charles. Once I put this together, I remembered that I live in a Hispanic neighborhood and things began to come together.
– Carlos V is a “milk chocolate style bar” which sounds like a lot of the silliness that happened with Whatchamacallit.
– The Carlos V contains a riddle in Spanish, with two options for breaking off. I don’t speak Spanish, but I bit into the “Si” side. I hope it was asking me if I was a cowboy.

Si, baby.

Si, baby.

Tasting Notes

– It tasted like chocolate that was just OK.
– Really, no frills. Just chocolate with a Spanish message. There are better chocolate bars out there. There are also probably better Spanish messages.

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WTF Is This?: Butterfinger Peanut Butter Cups

IMG_3551I’m dubious of anything that labels itself “smooth” and “crunchy” (was really hoping Google image search was going to dig up some gold on that one, but, alas, I have nothing to link to). Unless you have the proven reputation of jumbo shrimp, you best be careful throwin’ oxymorons around with such frivolity. Continue reading

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