WTF is This? Skittles Orchards

IMG_3745Ya damn right I held this post for St. Patrick’s Day because the bag was green.

Skittles’ newest offering is Orchards, which is supposedly comprised of fruit flavors grown in orchards, even though just about everybody says orange grove and nobody knows what a peach farm is called.

[Ed. note: Thank you, M&M-Mars, for the search phrase “What determines the nomenclature of a fruit garden?”]

My theory? Orchards is the severance package they offered Lime when it got demoted from the main bag in favor of the upstart Green Apple.

Poor Lime.

Tasting Notes

– Lime: Same ol’ good-ass lime.– Cherry: I usually love cherry-flavored things, but this tasted a little too much like a Sucret, which was too bad.
– Peach: I don’t ever eat peaches because they are gross. I don’t feel any different about peach-flavored things.
– Red apple: This is dumb. Red delicious apples are the least delicious apples, and this is the least delicious color of apple-flavored Skittle.
– Orange: Just hangin out, bein dull.
– Handful: Actually, the medley of these tastes pretty good. There’s a bizarre aftertaste I noticed about a minute after the last Skittle was gone, but it wasn’t bad when the chewing part was happening.

Many thanks to Shreya Bar for letting me know that these existed!

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