Breaking Off A Piece

Of all the flavors extracted from things that are used in making sweet things tasty (early favorite for qualifier of the year, I know), almond is by far my favorite.

It probably stems from my youth, when Mother Bar would consistently bake good-ass things flavored with almond, namely cake, cookies and, the best of them all, frosting. (If you have never had a tasty baked good with almond frosting, I encourage you to do so immediately, then if you don’t like it, escort yourself from the room and give your taste buds a talkin’ to because they need to straighten up, buster.)

For some reason, though, good-ass almond things don’t present themselves too often outside of my mom’s kitchen; too often they’re paired with pistachio — which, pistachio, I’m really happy for you and Imma let you finish, but … — or they are just those really hard cookies at Chinese restaurants. The ones that don’t tell you something about yourself while you’re eating them.

This also extends to candy bars.

I will give you a moment to think of an almond-flavored candy bar.

…

(No, Hershey’s with Almonds doesn’t count. It is chocolate-flavored and has a few almonds thrown in for texture and maybe because my man Hershey got had one too many drinks and started throwing shit into his candy all willy-nilly like. Hershey’s with Almonds as almond-flavored as funfetti cake is sprinkle-flavored.)

…

If you thought of something, it was probably Almond Joy (which, really, the purpose of those almonds are more textural than flavorful) or Snickers Almond. You might have considered Nature Valley Sweet and Salty Granola Bars, as they flirt with the definition of a candy bar, but you and I both know they are far too healthy for that distinction.

Which leaves Snickers Almond, only because I haven’t gotten a chance to disqualify it yet. So here we go: not an almond-flavored candy bar.

It’s the closest one there is, in my opinion, as its nougat is decidedly more almondy than it’s forefather’s, but the almond flavor still doesn’t carry far enough past the chocolate and the caramel.

That doesn’t make it bad, however. I’ll talk more specifically in Tasting Notes, but it’s still a tasty candy bar. It’s just not the almond-candy solution that me and probably one other person so desperately long for.

Which is kinda a bummer, I guess. But as long as my mom still keeps doing her thing, I can’t really be too upset.

Tasting Notes

– The nougat in the Snickers Almond is not only more almond-flavored than that of the Snickers, it also seems more dense. I haven’t had a Snickers in a minute or two, though, so I can confirm at a future time.
– The almonds in this bar also offer a harder crunch than do the peanuts in a regular Snickers, to a noticeable extent. Some loud crunching going on.
– Or maybe it’s just loud because of its proximity to my ear. I know I don’t chew with my mouth open, but it’s always a personal worry that the crunch is escaping the barrier of my cheek to disturb others in close proximity.
– This sounds like a fun test.
– Snickers Almond was the first candy bar I’ve eaten in entirety since M&M’s Crispy. I’ve either shared, saved for later, or thrown away everything since then.

Google Search That Brought Traffic To BOaP of the Day

“pictures of m and m candy”